Summer in the City was exhausting.
It was a lot of other things, like exciting and fun and new and busy and kind of hard, but overall the best adjective to use is definitely "exhausting".
Saturday morning I woke up at Emma's with her and Jerry, and was feeling very sort of apathetic about everything. We lazed around, went online, ate some food, took our time getting ready... we finally left to meet up with everyone at Hyde Park and got to the gathering about 2 and a half hours late. Oops.
There were probably double the amount of people there the second day. It was a little overwhelming, actually, seeing SO MANY PEOPLE all connected by the same website, all just milling around in a park. There was about another hour or so of mingling, chatting, signing things, taking pictures, meeting new people, etc. I got to see J0ames (whom I'd met for the first time when I was here back in March) and I got to speak with Anna (Coinkidink) a bit more and my new lovely friend Claire whom I'd only known due to a few exchanged emails in the past weeks, and another James, who apparently was at LeakyCon even though I didn't meet him there.
At one point Emma nudged me because she saw Alex walking off alone, so I followed him because I couldn't handle another whole day of being in the same place and not speaking. I caught up to him finally and we chatted for about 10-15 minutes about surface level things, and that went pretty okay. Then we decided to get food together, grabbed a few of our friends, and headed off in search of pizza. We never found pizza, but instead found a pub that we sat in, eating and drinking and conversing for at least an hour. It was nice, but it felt weird. I wont deny that. The fact is that it felt the same, only that we weren't dating. That's.. I dunno.
At this point we decided to go back to the gathering only to find that everyone was heading off to the place where the gig was going to be that night, so we turned right around and headed to the tube to get to the Luminaire. Turns out we were early, so we sat in ANOTHER pub for awhile, where I got to know the likes of James (both of them), Anna and Claire a lot better (Jerry and Emma were there as well, obviously. We were inseparable all weekend).
When we finally headed over to the gig (which was literally right next door, upstairs), they didn't want to let us in.
Because it was "full".
I was SO PISSED OFF.
I pulled the "I came all the way from SEATTLE" card, and the bouncer didn't give a crap, and then a girl came out and saw me and Jerry huddled by the door and was like "Oh these two NEED to get in" and after a few frantic text messages and me getting a bit red in the face, another guy was like "Oh just let them up." Bless him.
The gig was fun, kind of.
I really started to understand the full scope of how powerful music can be though, as two of the songs that were played over the course of the night were songs that had a lot of meaning to me with regard to a certain recent relationship I was in. It kind of made me get a bit messy, though that might have had to do with the shots of tequila Jazza's friends decided it would be a good idea to keep giving me.
I don't want to talk about it anymore, but I hope to never experience another night like that ever again in my life. It was too hard. It was too incredibly hard and I know I am going to need to go into iTunes and delete a lot of my favorite songs for a very long time, at least until they don't mean anything to me anymore. And probably not drink for awhile.
I am just so, so, so, so incredibly thankful I have people in my life like Jerry and J0ames and Jazza and the other James and Liam who are always there for me and would never make me cry or leave me to take care of myself. Claire and Anna and Becky and Emma and Johnny and Tino and Gary and everyone here is so amazing, and I got a bit emotional Saturday night about going home eventually too... because even though there are things in London that I definitely need to get away from, there are also a lot of wonderful people here that I don't know what I am going to do without them.
It sucks, because I came to London wanting to fall in love with it, because I assumed this would eventually be my second home. And now, after being here a month, and realizing I like it a lot more than I ever thought I would... well, it's just not going to be anymore. That idea of spending months here at a time for the rest of my life is still so fresh in my brain that it's hard to shake the notion... but now when I go home at the end of next month... who KNOWS when I'll be back. :/
Okay, but on that note, I met Stephen (3sixty5days) from Red at the gig! And we were super excited to meet each other and super excited about my coming to Dublin next week to film things with him and Adam (whataboutadam) for Red. So that was a good part of the night!
We took a cab home and that was the end of SITC Day #2. x.x
Days until I leave: 24
Times I've had Indian food: 10
bread and circuses
48 minutes ago