I am emotionaaal.
One hereditary trait I got from my mom was the ability to cry at EVERYTHING. I cried when I saw the new Dakota Fanning version of Charlotte's Web. I cried last night when Mad Eye did the Cruciatus Curse on a spider in front of Neville. I BAWLED during the last episode of Torchwood Season 3.
So I suppose you can probably imagine what might happen when I take my boyfriend to the airport to send him home to London.
Alex was at my house for 2 months and sending him home this time was one of the most horrible things I've ever had to do. I know that a lot of people (him included) think I'm silly for blubbering all over the place when I am literally leaving for the UK two weeks from today, but that's not why I am so bent out of shape. It's not the two weeks that are making my stomach tie up in knots.
It's just that he was here for two months. That's a really long time. You get used to things in two months. It feels like he lives here. My housemates feel like he's just another person in the house, and we definitely developed our little routines and things we did that wont feel right anymore. And like when Sam left, everything reminds me of him. The slanket on my bed. The tub of brownies I now have to finish alone. The imprint of his suitcase on my carpet.
I just know that in a mere two weeks, I am not going to adapt back to life by myself. And then I will go to London and have a glorious and wonderful two months there, but THEN. Then I come home alone. That's a life I am now unfamiliar with. That's why I have been crying.
Alex's mom and Becky and Charlie are all going to pick him up at the airport because they miss him so much and I am so glad he'll have a welcoming committee. Aside from my parents... I doubt anyone will be waiting at the airport for me when I get home in September.
This is moody and probably gross for other people to read but I am a mess right now and I don't know what else to do with myself. Alex and I usually stay in bed and watch Arrested Development or snuggle or eat cereal with bananas in it at this time of day.
Long distance is hard. So worth it, but hard.
I miss him.
Edit: Almost harder than saying goodbye to Alex was tearing Max and Beverly, our turtles, apart. Not fun. Beverly went back to London too.
the cooking show opinion
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